why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
We have started to decorate penises.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
