I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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