Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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