he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize