OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
