Whatcha textin bout Willis?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
