Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Are we in a gay sports bar?
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
