Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Randomize
