would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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