It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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