why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
