Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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