Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
