If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Randomize
