Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Randomize
