My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
