I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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