just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
