Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Randomize
