i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
