I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
