How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
