remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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