there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
