Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
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