You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
