You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Randomize
