am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
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