Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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