So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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