That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
