Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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