i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
