Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
