I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
