I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
