: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
if one more of _____'s family tells me "you're next" i'm going to shoot myself. Thank god for gin (most protestant phrase ever at the most Jewish wedding ever)
Ask for a julep and start talking about how you much prefer the uncircumsized peen. that should probably stop them.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Oh and itβs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ππππ¬π³π
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