i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
