Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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