found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
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