You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize
