The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
