4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Tell her she can't have a vagina
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Randomize
