I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
