Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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