I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
He keeps bees of course he's weird
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
