I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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