she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
