He is an equal opportunity slut.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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