ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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